Why Don’t People Answer Their Emails?

I know I didn’t email you back and I am not necessarily sorry.

Why you shouldn’t apologize, either!

How do you feel when someone you know tells you, “I’m not going to email you again, because you never reply to me, anyway”?  I would venture to guess it makes one feel like you have been sent to “time out”!  It does to me.

Recently, I have heard that from enough people to realize I may need to address the issue.  At least, that’s what I first thought.  And then I thought about it- see if this sounds familiar:

In recent history, have you:

  • Experienced population growth in your household?
  • Accepted a new job or role within your company?
  • Offered to serve in a leadership role of a volunteer organization?
  • Moved to a new city, state, or part of the country?
  • Taken up a new hobby you really enjoy?

Life-PrioritiesFor many people, simply adopting one of the above suggestions would be a “game changer” for your priorities.  The shift compounds exponentially when you take one two, three, or even ALL of the above.  It can be easy to feel overwhelmed. If I were to speculate as to what has “suffered” as a result of your new (and very productive, satisfying endeavors) becoming a significant part of your life, I might guess your email might not be as important as it once was, along with less time on social media, dealing less with OPD (other people’s drama), feeling sad or lonely, and generally feeling less satisfied with life.

When you make significant activity changes in your life and shift your focus to yourself, many benefits surface.  Most people report experiencing:

  • Better health
  • Stronger personal relationships
  • Feelings of gratitude
  • Increased satisfaction in the workplace, or even
  • The joy of becoming a parent for the first time.

Taking deliberate steps to improve your own life doesn’t mean you should ignore your responsibilities as a friend, co-worker, association member or neighbor….but it IS okay to enjoy the fruits of your decisions and shake off that guilt for not returning ALL of those emails as quickly as someone else thinks perhaps you should have. The CONNECTion you build as a result of living a happier, healthier, more fulfilling life will far outweigh responding to the demands of others.

However, ignoring ALL of those emails could be detrimental to your business, so be sure to carve out a little time for them…You just don’t have to apologize for taking a little longer to respond.

Get active.  Get healthy.  Do something you WANT to do.  Make good in the world.  CONNECT!


Remember the Ten!

It’s been a short hiatus since my last post, but I assure you a LOT is happening these days!

Earlier this year, I challenged myself to run a 10k Race before the summer. Yesterday, I made good on that personal goal. In 1 hour 3 minutes and 43 seconds, I finished! My personal goal had been 1 hour 10 min-and I beat it by 6 minutes!

The Remember the Ten 10k event was started three years ago in honor of a group of 10 amazing men affiliated with the Oklahoma State University basketball program who perished in a plane crash on January 21, 2001. As a graduate of OSU, this event held a particular place in my heart.

During college, I was president of a group of basketball “superfans” known as the “Young Guns”. After each game, we always picked our VIP of the game award, and announced it at center court in front of the radio broadcast crew. On that fateful night in 2001, we lost Bill Teegins, the “Voice of the Cowboys”.

A good friend of mine in school lost his brother, Jarred Weiberg. And my current workout partner lost a friend he used to play basketball against in high school, Pat Noyes. Each of the others each hold a special place in the hearts of the Cowboy Faithful as well, and for all ten of of you… I ran this year. Thanks to each of you for the continued inspiration you give to me and all 1200 of this year’s registered runners in the 10k, 5k, and 1 mile fun run!

This year, as each of you think about how to make every day count, and define your own success, you are encouraged to pick out a tough challenge for yourself and DO IT!

Get High With Me!

Fitness continues to be a major part of my life. Over the past (nearly) year and a half, commitment to a regular exercise plan and paying more attention to what and how I eat has helped me shed 40 pounds (net -meaning I’ve put on lean muscle and dropped even more bulk fat) (Special thanks to the training staff at Fitness Together-Kingspoint Village). When you combine that with a renewed sense of center in my spiritual life (read: I found an amazing church home that really suits me), and (since we made it “official” by posting it to Facebook today) a new girlfriend.

It is no wonder I started out 2009 with two of the most financially successful months I’ve had in over a year and continue to ride the wave of good fortune and success as new opportunities are presented to me each day. Maybe there is something to this Power of Attraction stuff after all!

I’m on a bit of a “runners high” as I write this blog tonight. By settling in at a comfortable (read: slow) pace, I found a rhythm tonight that probably would have let me run twice as far as my typical run. Using the tools at logyourrun.com, I mapped out the route I ran tonight and thought I’d share the route here on the blog.

It’s not that I expect you’ll want to come on over and run the route with me sometime, rather, it serves as yet another subtle way to share the tools we use to find success each day with others around us on in this increasingly negatively influenced world.

SO, here are your three steps for fitness success today:

1) Turn off the television. You will be AMAZED at just how much the negative sensationalism is fed into your brain every day by the mainstream media. Television is powered by one thing: ratings. Fact: Info-tainment scores higher ratings than pure news. It’s just a fact.
2) Feed your head with positive energy: Seek out books, people, time for quiet reflection and open your mind to a spiritual way of thinking. I’m not saying you have to become a monk or a “bible-thumper” or anything any more extreme than just stepping outside yourself to view your life from about 40,000 feet and understand how significant a positive spiritual influence can be for you.
3) Get off your butt. Continuing to talk about what you “should be doing” about your lack of fitness isn’t going to fix the problem. I don’t care if you hire a trainer, go for a walk, participate in a cycling event (Registration opened today for the Tulsa Tough 2009 rides, including the spandex-free Townie Ride- borrow a helmet, dust off that bike and join us!) , or email me at scott@cookseyconnects.com and tell me what day you want to come over and run the route below with me. Need to walk it? Okay! If that’s the push you need, I’m going to help you get that ball rolling. Come on over, and we’ll get a success “high”, together!

Re-wiring the Communication Gap

I don’t know anything about the company whose logo appears on this video, so this is NOT an endorsement. As a speaking professional (and a man), however, this presentation is pretty well delivered. OH, and I think you’ll get a kick out of his message.

Question you can answer in the comment section:

Please share a story about a time when a simple communication issue kept you from achieving a desired result.

Run Your Own Race – I Did!

One of my goals for 2008 was to run a 5k (3.1 mile) race. Yesterday, I did it!

Saturday marked the 31st running of the Tulsa Run. Okay, the BIG race is a 15k, and I’m not ready for that, but I did participate in the 5k. As odd as it sounds coming from me, it won’t be my last. What a great experience!

At race time, it was a little over 40 degrees (Fahrenheit) with no wind. My “runner friends” tell me that was about as nice of conditions we could have wanted. I have to agree. It was a great!

Many runners sported t-shirts supporting one school or another, some group from their employer or club, and a plethora of political candidates up for election next month. One of the hot issues in Tulsa is the condition of our streets. It’s been an issue for some time, and I found it ironic that prominently in the 2nd or 3rd block after leaving the Start line, was an enormous pothole many runners had to swerve to avoid. Okay, point taken, I’ll check the “YES” box in propositions One and Two, allegedly to Fix Our Streets….yet again.

The course (see map) proceeded out of Downtown Tulsa, crossing an overpass into the Riverview neighborhood, before zigging over Denver Avenue and down the hill to Riverside Drive, along the Arkansas River. Shortly after hitting Riverside, was a turn-around (where we quickly passed a local cover band playing to the crowd – sorry I couldn’t tell you who it was, as I was rockin’ to my iPod by that point in the run). Then…the fun began.

About 2 miles into the run, the route turned back toward Downtown – UP Denver Avenue for about a mile. It’s safe to say the pace was a little slower after the turn, since it was certainly more UPhill. That’s okay, I’ve been feeling pretty good lately, and the training runs on asphalt (vs. treadmill) have definitely paid off. Then I saw him. My “inspiration man”.

Over the past 12 months, I’ve worked tireless hours training and changing my lifestyle to shed myself of a net of 30 lbs. I say NET because I’ve lost more than that in fat, while adding lean muscle. I must say, I’m in the best shape of my life, and say THANKS to the guys at Fitness Together Kingspointe Village for getting me off on the right foot!

With about half a mile left in the run, I was alternating a little more between my running pace and a brisk walk (runners call that “intervals”). There was another runner I noticed was swapping a lead back and forth with me. He was wearing a brown hat which sported a simple, two-word message on the back, “Size Matters”. That was all I needed. I had my mark. NO WAY was he going to beat me at the finish of this race. I am 6’3″, 260 lbs and running two races. First, I was competing against the clock. Based on my training runs, under 38 minutes was a given, and under 35 would make me VERY happy! Second, running in the “Clydesdale 230+” class, I was running against the other “big fellas” out on the road. So, in my case, size really DOES matter!

Closing in on the finish line in front of the newly completed, Cesar Pelli designed, BOk Center it was time to kick it up a notch. I couldn’t read the clock, but felt good about my pace…besides, I had uncovered my competitiveness with the “Size Matters” guy and needed to settle this once and for all. In my head, over the thumping bass in my earbuds, I heard a voice urging me to “Finish strong, Cooksey! Finish strong!” and sprung into a finishing sprint for the past 10th of a mile. As I kicked, I passed about 20+ runners who were simply spent, including my “hat brother”. When I checked the Official Results online today, I had finished 10th in the Clydesdale 230+ class (out of 27, thank you very much!).

My official time: 33:04. The site lists something called an “Age Weighted” time of 32:22. Either way, I am STOKED! It was my race and I beat my goal.

What goal will you set for yourself, commit to, and attempt? Leave your comments here on the blog!

Accountabilty Matters

See Coach Gundy’s Rant Here!

Perhaps there is another way to drive home his point, but I have to tip my hat this week to Coach Mike Gundy of the Oklahoma State Cowboys for defending a player.

While I appreciate the attention and research conducted by most of the writers involved with the media, let’s face it. It isn’t all that uncommon to find some degree of misinformation or quotes taken out of context in a report from any media source, on a given day.

To see a football coach, however, call out a reporter for gross inaccuracies in a newspaper report in defense of a player recently moved from his season start at quarterback to a different role on the team, is something else.

Coach Gundy is known as a “players coach”. To any parent wondering about the Oklahoma State coaching staff’s dedication to players, I think that was solved with the video clip you just watched. In full disclosure, I’m a graduate and long-time football season ticket holder at Oklahoma State. Sure, I’ve watched a coaching staff bring in talented recruits in recent years, only to fall short of the “spectacular season” we always seem to be promised. Hey, I’ve never played a down of football in my life, nor have I coached. I am a fan of the game, however, and I do like to see my team win.

Well, this weekend the OSU Cowboys pulled off a spectacular win over a talented Texas Tech football team (led by standout quarterback Graham Harrell). I’m hoping we’ve righted the ship for the season. We’ll see.

As for today, Coach Gundy, thanks for standing up for our players and showing your passion, fire, and dedication to team. Reid isn’t a failure, he’s a student-athlete who still supports, contributes, and plays on our team. Thanks for correcting the reporter. Can you do something about the ticket prices? Go Pokes!